


too tender

by y0ukai



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Aftercare, BDSM, Dom Mark Lee (NCT), Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Panic Attacks, Sub Lee Donghyuck | Haechan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-29
Updated: 2019-08-29
Packaged: 2020-09-28 21:34:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20432789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/y0ukai/pseuds/y0ukai
Summary: donghyuck doesn’t know if he should say it, and the word pools heavy in his throat. but he trusts mark, doesn’t he?





	too tender

**Author's Note:**

> hello! i am dudi ^__^  
i’ve been writing for a very long time, but i only recently started writing in english (since it’s not my first language), so be patient with me! ><  
this is also my first work here on AO3. it’s very small and simple, but i enjoyed writing it ^__^
> 
> \- remember to always trust your partners in situations like this!;

donghyuck feels like he’s choking.

mark’s weight on top of him feels familiar, warm, and could lull him to sleep easily if his whole body didn’t feel like it was covered in a sticky, gross amber. his chest is constricted, his brain can’t focus on anything except the ropes that are too thick too tight too much on his legs and wrists, and donghyuck feels the urge to cry climbing up his throat.

it’s far from usual, this feeling. scenes like this － or even rougher ones － never scared him, they always felt right and he always felt safe within mark’s always-so-sweet reach. he even asked for it, blinking dreamily up at his boyfriend and saying _pretty please tie me up and use me_. but it’s not feeling right, mark’s soft lips on his neck are making him squirm and his hands are too hot and his knees hurt from being bent for too long. donghyuck wants to escape, to curl up in a little ball and hide. the safeword is hiding beneath his eyelids, tempting, a curse and a promise. he knows mark wouldn’t hurt him, he knows mark would stop, he knows how mark lee is.

he doesn’t say it.

eyes shut tight, he waits for it all to end. he tightens against the knots and scratchy rope when mark bites at his tender skin, he whines halfheartedly when the older leaves hickeys along the exposed parts of his chest and neck. donghyuck is strong, he won’t crack because of something so silly; he doesn’t have the right to say the word when he himself asked to be tied up and used. he’s shaking when mark stands up to get the vibrator, and _by god_ does he want to like it, to beg for it like he always does, but his chest feels so heavy, his whole body hurts from this ungodly position － he is definitely _not_ flexible enough for it －, and maybe donghyuck really should use the safeword.

he’s shuddering so hard that mark actually notices something isn’t right. donghyuck is lewd when they have sex, wild and foulmouthed and needy, never quiet or too obedient. gently, he touches his boyfriend’s thigh, furrowing his brow when he notices the tears rolling down the side of his head. “hyuckie? are you with me?” his voice is laced with both fondness and worry, and donghyuck’s heart is thumping against his ribcage. he needs to say it, he needs to trust mark and to trust his own body and mind, even if (in another universe) mark gets mad at him and his irresponsibility.

donghyuck hiccups. shakes his head vehemently. _no._ “sun,” and it’s enough for his throat to unclench and he sobs, waiting for a scream or a punishment or to be humiliated and ignored, but it never happends, it would never happend. he’s free of his restraints before he can even comprehend what’s happening, still trembling and hurting all over, his sweaty skin sticking to everything and overwhelming him. donghyuck finally opens his eyes when the older stretches his legs and arms, relief flooding through his system when his joints finally stop throbbing. everything is blurry, his breathing is still fast, he’s still a sweaty mess, but he’s free.

donghyuck doesn’t notice he’s murmuring apologies, he’s too out of it, but mark is attentive: he makes sure the ropes are far from him, he softly touches his boyfriend’s arms and hands, shushing his desperate whispers and trying his best to call his attention without overwhelming him even more. seeing his beloved donghyuck in such a state has mark’s blood pressure skyrocketing, he feels like shit, but right now he has no time to think about himself.

“love, it’s okay, see? i’m here,” donghyuck’s sobs shatter mark’s heart, and the older pulls him into a sitting position, closer to him and where donghyuck can see his face. poor angel can’t stop shaking, breathing fast and ignoring mark’s eyes in some sort of defense method, but he won’t have any of this. mark cups donghyuck’s wet chin and forces him to make eye contact, free hand immediately finding donghyuck’s and holding it. “hyuck, come on, hm? deep breaths, see? do it with me.” they breathe together for a few seconds, mark counting in a soft voice, squeezing his boyfriend’s hand encouragingly, watching as he slowly stops shaking and his eyes go back to focus, hearts still thumping in their chests from the big scare. they’re still very much naked, donghyuck’s body is still covered in angry-red rope marks, but mark doesn’t want to even think about sex after this, shaken to his core.

“do you want to talk about what just happened?” mark’s voice is delicate, his thumb stroking donghyuck’s hand, and the younger himself doesn’t know the answer. was it stress-induced? did mark do something wrong? was anything seriously hurt? his mind wandered everywhere, but it seemed like he just didn’t want to have sex. how could mark have done anything wrong, too? just looking into his big, worried eyes made donghyuck feel calm. he isn’t able to reply, though. his throat is still shut tight, his hands still feel cold, so donghyuck only shakes his head no, focusing on steadying his breathing. mark caresses his cheek with his thumb carefully, still frowning and serious. “it’s okay. i’ll run you a bath, hm? wanna come with me or wait here?”

the water is warm, and the whole bathroom smells of vanilla milk, just like donghyuck likes it. they both fit snugly in the tub, pressed against each other and arms tangled lazily. mark doesn’t press for answers, murmuring some melodies as he softly scrubs donghyuck’s back with a soapy sponge, and the smaller is so thankful for him, for his patience and his sweetness, that he might as well start crying.

“_hyung_?” the bathroom’s so quiet his own voice startled him, but mark only hums in response. “i’m really sorry i freaked out on you... and sorry for ruining our fun, i don’t know what’s gotten into me today.” he feels fragile in mark’s arms, tense like the string of a bow, and it hurts the older. he knows donghyuck doesn’t mean it, he knows it’s not his own fault, but it still stings when it seems like the smaller doesn’t fully trust mark.

“why are you apologizing, hyuck?” he places a kiss on donghyuck’s shoulder blade, his skin hot and lightly flushed. “it’s fine. if you aren’t liking it, you stop me. isn’t that the deal?”

“but i feel like such a fool! i shouldn’t have stopped you, hyung, i was just being stupid! i even asked for it, didn’t i,” his voice is trembling, he can feel the claws closing around his neck as the tears well in his eyes, but it’s true. it’s just the truth.

except it isn’t,_ it isn’t_, and mark feels gross just imagining why donghyuck would think such disgusting things. “you might have asked for it, donghyuck, but _never_ feel like you have to take it until the end, ever,” mark’s voice is firm but caring, and he places a comforting hand on donghyuck’s arm. “please, whenever you feel like you aren’t enjoying the scene, say the safeword. do you really think i would be disappointed in you?”

it’s silent for a few seconds, only the water sloshing against the bathtub and their breathings. donghyuck feels even dumber, but also relieved, thankful, loved. he softens against mark’s broad chest, feeling like he can finally breathe properly, encased in his strong arms and feeling his heart thrum against his back. mark rubs the faint marks of the rope in his forearms, kisses donghyuck’s curly hair and sighs, they both melting and letting their bodies soak in the bubbly water.

“i love you so much,” and it’s almost lost in the thick, damp air, a syrupy murmur that engulfs mark’s heart and almost punches the air out of his lungs. “thank you for being so patient with me.”

“always, baby. you matter so much to me,” he intertwines their fingers, so full of adoration it hurts. “i would never willingly hurt you, okay? i love you so much, donghyuck.” it’s just as thick, like honey and daisies and pure unrestrained love, and everything slowly settles back into place, their minds being put at ease.

they had each other and that was enough for now.


End file.
